i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
