So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
