Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize