Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Randomize
