I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
this just has baby written all over it
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
