I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
