I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
