so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Randomize
