I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Come share oat with me in your robe
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Randomize
