I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
