is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
