I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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