I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I will be naked everywhere
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
