Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Randomize
