i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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