i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
