Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Randomize