Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Randomize
