what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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