We tried having a conversation with our noses.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
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