Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
It's blow job season.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
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