Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
This house was built for laser tag.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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