You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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