So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
