Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
