its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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