Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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