i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Randomize
