Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Randomize
