Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Randomize
