If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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