S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
