Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize
