The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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