I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
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