Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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