already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
