i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I can't turn off my feet"
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
