I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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