your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
