I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
