Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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