Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Randomize
