i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
3pm strippers are depressing
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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