My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
