your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
