Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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