So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
