Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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