PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Need sex. Gaining weight.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
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